These Minion movie quotes are brilliant. They are incredibly relatable. Like the film, these ingenious quotes will make you laugh so much it hurts. Here’s a few examples:
- “Oh, honey! Women don’t snore, we purrrrr.” - “Just because I can’t sing doesn’t mean I won’t sing.” - “Don't grow up, it’s a trap!”
Keep reading for more hilarious Minion quotes…
The Funniest Minion Quotes
When you really want to slap someone, do it and say “Mosquito”.
- Just because I can’t sing doesn’t mean I won’t sing.
- If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while, it won’t feel like you’re alone anymore.
- Don't grow up, it’s a trap!
- Dear haters, I couldn’t help but notice that ‘awesome’ ends with ‘me’ and ‘ugly starts with ‘u’.
- Mess with me? I’ll let karma do its job. Mess with my family or friends? I become karma!
- I wonder if common sense will ever make a comeback?
- Remember, if we get caught, you are deaf and I don’t speak English!
- Dear Stress, let's break up.
- My diet plan: make all my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look.
- Respect your parents. They passed school without Google!
- When you’re stressed, you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.
- I keep telling myself I need to stop talking to weirdos, but if I did that, I wouldn’t have any friends left!
- I might look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head, I’m quite busy.
- Honestly, I’m an angel. The horns are just there so my halo sits straight.
- *Phone on silent*. 10 missed calls. *Turns volume to loudest*. Nobody calls all day.
- They say milk gives you strength, so I drank 5 glasses and still couldn’t move a wall… I tried 5 shots of vodka and saw the wall move itself.
- It takes real skill to choke on air, fall up stairs and trip over completely nothing. I have that skill.
- Note to self: just because it pops into my head does not mean it should come out of my mouth.
- It’s ok to talk to yourself, it’s even ok to answer yourself, but when you ask yourself to repeat what you just said, you have a problem!!
- Oh, honey! Women don’t snore, we purrrrr.
- Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
- Every time I lose some weight I find it again in the refrigerator.
- Sometimes the grass will appear greener on the other side because it has been fertilised with bullshit!
- I’m going to try and act like a normal, happy and mentally stable person. Wish me luck.
- I can’t make everyone happy. I’m not bacon!!
- I stay up late every night, regret it every morning, and then do it all over again!
- Where does all my money go? It’s like, hocus pocus I’m broke.
- Your husband will always be your biggest and oldest child that requires the most adult supervision.
- All I need right now is a hug and five hundred thousand dollars in cash!
- When life gives you lemons, freeze them and throw them as hard as you can at the people making your life difficult!
- The hacker was so disappointed in my bank account… He started a go fund me page.
- I’m in the mood to misbehave! Who’s with me!!!
- Police: “You were going fast” Me: “I was trying to keep up with traffic. Police: “there isn’t any.” Me: I know! That’s how far behind I am.
- OMG! Tomorrow’s Monday?!!
- Send me words of encouragement so I don’t murder someone at work. There is no Netflix in prison.
- I wouldn’t have to manage my anger if people would manage their stupidity.
That moment when you walk into a spider web and suddenly turn into a karate master.
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